our {home}birth story. baby 6.

My little Miss is laying beside me sound asleep, and I just scarfed down lunch,

so I figured now would be a good time to tell her story.

My whole pregnancy was what my husband likes to call a season of hibernation.

I slept all nine months away, and when I wasn't sleeping, I was piled up in my bed

with my feet up. I started having braxton hicks contractions right at the 20 week mark,

and they grew in frequency throughout. The last couple of weeks, we actually 

had false labor more than once and ended up calling the midwife more then once just to 

put her on stand by. I kept having contractions that were a little painful and they would

consistently be five minutes apart, and once, three minutes apart, but always fizzled out

after no more than two-ish hours.

Those last couple of weeks, she was sitting really low in my pelvic area. I felt bruised

and so sore every darn day for weeks. My calves were swollen for those last couple weeks, too,

perhaps even for that whole last month. And my feet decided to swell so much I couldn't

get my sandals on anymore. I had to resort to my most hated shoe: the flip flop. 

I did manage to squeeze on some older tennies though, so I could walk without my feet 

dying from lack of support and being rubbed by the stupid flips.

I went to bed several nights leading up to her birth thinking... this is the night. Probably 

more wishful thinking than anything. I was so uncomfortable and I hurt every day that I just

really wanted her out of me. We tried many methods of natural induction, but most don't

really work unless baby is actually ready to come out. So I like to believe that all the things we

tried just helped the process once she was ready to eject herself from my body.

The night before she was born, I went to bed as usual, got up to pee as usual, but one of those

times after I laid back down, I felt a little sick to my stomach, had a few chills, but my body

never cleaned itself out (like it did with Greyson), so I didn't even think much of it.

Though, looking back, it was probably a sign of my impending labor.

The next morning was like any other. I woke up and stayed in bed, taking my usual morning nap.

Yes, after Toby left, I totally went back to sleep almost everyday. That is just how much of a 

toll this pregnancy took on me. (Sometimes I would even nap again in the afternoon. Or doze

on and off all the live long day. Hence, the reason my honey called it hibernating).

{last belly shot. 40 weeks. 6 days.}

Around 9:30 or so that morning, I started having more contractions, which I was ready to chalk up to 

braxton hicks, only they were feeling a little more crampy than all the other ones I had

had up until this point. Still, I didn't think a whole lot of it until I finally crawled out of bed 

around 10:15 and went pee, only to find blood on the toilet paper and blood clumps in the 

toilet. (by the way: it's going to be a messy story, just to give you a warning.)

I started crying and said out loud, "Thank God!" I can't even explain to you the amount of relief I felt

when I saw red on the toilet paper. Finally! It was time!

I texted Toby and said, "we're having a baby today!!!!!!!!!!!"

him: NOW?!

me: I'm bleeding some. Calling Dawn in a minute.

Totally normal! Don't freak out!

him: You know me so well... :)

At this point, the contractions were still 7-8 minutes apart. I was still walking around doing last

minute things, pausing through surges. With my last birth, it was fast and furious,

2 hours, 20 minutes from the first contraction til the birth (just for reference).

So we thought we were in for a quickie birth. I called the midwife, I called my mom, 

and Toby headed home. I labored for a while, standing up, because that was the most comfortable

way with the least amount of pain. In between contractions, I'd sit with my feet up,

because like I said, from the knees down, I was swollen and my legs and feet were getting

tired.

Once things started progressing, and I had been wiping blood every time I went to the bathroom,

we decided to call Dawn (midwife) when I had another clot in the toilet, a little bigger than

quarter size. I was wearing a pad this whole time because I was passing blood with each

contraction and potty break. It wasn't flowing, so there was no cause for concern.

Dawn and Hannah (her intern) arrived around 2:15 or 2:30 and monitored me, checking on baby

every thirty minutes. Dawn did a check on me since I was bleeding so much and I was 7-8cm
and 90% effaced. It was comforting to know I had progressed so much already.
We were all on high alert, knowing things could quickly progress

at any minute. However, this labor was already longer than my last, so I found things to be

unpredictable at this point.

Toby was with me through nearly every contraction, though he had to step out on occasion to handle

the boys and refill my water. But once he noticed they were getting stronger,

and I was breathing deeper and louder, he stayed right next to me rubbing my back and reminding

me to breathe and encouraging me, telling me I could do this. Around 4ish, Dawn and Hannah

made their way into my room with me to monitor the baby every 15 minutes through a contracton.

During one, Hannah actually had to move the doppler down as the baby descended. That was 

kind of neat, to know my baby and body were doing exactly what they needed to do. Baby's 

heartbeat never once dipped. She was great.

I was still passing blood at this point with every bathroom break, so I had my undies on the whole time to prevent a big mess. Little did I know...

Here is where time escapes me. At some point, the contractions were coming so hard that I started

verbalizing, moaning, through each contraction, focusing on my breaths... all the way in, 

all the way out, no shallow breathing. I had several really, really hard contractions.

They were getting closer, but not back to back. Through the strong ones, I felt it natural

to sway my hips and dip them, like a mini squat. My dresser is about chin height for me

so I found it to be what I wanted to hang on to. Eventually I moved one hand to grab onto 

Toby's hand, and still kept my other on the dresser. I now know I was going through

transition with these. In fact, I had one and thought, I need to take my underwear off soon.

Then I had another and thought, I'm going to take my undies off as soon as this one ends.

And right at the tail end of that one, my water broke, and I said, "I need to push!"

So it was go time, and everyone scrambled to get the floor pads down. There was so much

fluid, so much. And it was mixed with blood, which still, there wasn't cause for concern.

I asked if we could move over beside the bed where I could put my hands on the bed.

Toby had his hand under mine, and I learned later that I was giving him the death squeeze

and his wedding ring was cutting into his hand. I really had no idea I was squeezing that hard.

Another contraction went by, but I didn't feel like I should push just yet.

Then the next one came and I had my feet apart and my knees bent in a very slight squat and

I beared down with all I had in me. I remember saying that I couldn't get her head out.
And for me, this is when the real pain started to hit. I felt her head ease back up just a tad,

and I waited for the next contraction. I knew that I could not keep trying to push 

with no results, so I had determined in my head that with the next surge, it would be the last push.

So when I felt that need with the next contraction, I gave it all I had and managed to get her head through, and at some point saying, "get her out! I need her out!" and then her shoulders came out

and my baby was born into Hannah's hands! And of course, with her coming out,

more fluid came out, more blood. It was so messy, like crazy messy. All four of us had 

blood and fluid on us.

Hannah passed the baby to me through my legs, and she was a bloody mess, with vernix all

over her, despite her being a day shy of 41 weeks.

After a minute, Dawn asked me to lay down on the bed, but I could not get a foot hold 

because the floor pads were so soaked I kept slipping every time I put my foot down. 

So once we got that worked out, I climbed up in the bed and put the baby down beside me so 

the midwives could do their thang and check the baby over.

Then it was time to deliver the placenta. So on the next contraction, I pushed as hard 

as I could while laying on my side. And she started wiggling the placenta out like they do.

Only, mine didn't come out, it severed from the cord, and Dawn acted so quickly and

reached up in there and grabbed it (missing it the first time, and reaching again) and

pulled the detached placenta out of me. It was a little scary since I had no idea what

was actually happening. She reacted so quickly. She said she couldn't believe how calm I was,

but honestly, I had no reason to freak out, because I didn't know what was happening just yet.

She showed us where the cord had become severed. And basically, that's why I bled so much.

The cord was partially severed in utero causing blood from the cord and the placenta to make

it's way out of me. And there was even more blood that came with the placenta being delivered.

Greyson's birth was incredibly clean, so this was definitely different. (After a shower,
 Dawn did check me to make sure no placenta was left inside.)

Dawn never really said any scary words regarding her cord, except to say that she was a very

lucky little girl, and Someone was watching out for her and wanted her here. 

I couldn't find much information on the umbilical cord severing from the placenta,

but from what I could gather, this baby could have had a very different story.

I thank God that she didn't. And it took a couple of days for it to sink in that we were

lucky and blessed and we could have lost her if she had brewed too much longer.

Toby thinks that this is the reason my body wanted to rest and stay laid up in bed

during the whole pregnancy. Maybe it was.

Along with that bit of crazy, her cord was in a natural knot. At some point early on,

she swam herself into a loop and knotted up her cord. At her sono, the cord

was pulsing just as it should. And with every appointment, her heartbeat was perfect.

{natural knot.}

 {first poo. which i missed, because i was holed up in the bathroom trying to clean up.}

{hater of the baby wipe.}

{daddy got to weigh her.}

She is amazing and I can't believe I get to mother a little girl. I know having a daughter is 

special. But after five boys (that I would not trade for anything), she is so, so special

to me. I want her super close to me all the time. She's so beautiful, and my momma

says she looks like I did when I was a baby. 

We are six days postpartum and she nurses like a champ, sleeps in regular spurts,

though all I wanna do is hold her while she sleeps, and she stays awake for insane

amounts of time for only being just born. Her brothers love her. Greyson loved her

immediately, Brennen wasn't sure at first, but is finally coming around and rubbing

her head and kissing her. And the bigger three adore her, too.

And that's the birth of Ruby Penelope.

June 24th, 2015

5:47pm

7lbs 8oz

19" long

 {two days old.}

xoxo

ninth month struggles.

the real 9th month struggles.

1. the out of control, i apologize for what is happening, cleavage.

2. to get new undies that last month or not. because the current ones cut into the legs.

3. nothing sounds good to eat. ever.

4. the waddle.

5. the ridiculous amount of effort it takes to crawl into bed.

6. the ridiculous amount of effort it takes to crawl out of bed.

7. needing to pee 847 times per hour.

8. there is no, lemme just squeeze through here.

9. the clumsiness. geez. lemme just drop all the things.

10. pretty sure i just accidentally fell asleep again.

11. hip and pelvic and pubic and leg pain.

12. braxton hicks that aren't painless and occur all the live long day.

13. when the toddler starts doing something you need to jump up to stop. 

but you just can't jump up in a hurry anymore.

14. strangers ask if you're "close," and you say yes, but think, not close enough!

15. putting on pants.

16. and shoes.

17. thinking something sounds super delish, but four bites in and you wanna throw it out.

18. losing total focus.

and losing total focus on something you were just saying.

19. everything under the whole flippin' sun takes so much effort and often causes discomfort
of some sort.

20. everyone else has to deal with the cranky. the mean. the whiny. the lack of tolerance.
the unpleasant. and all the will you please pick that up off the floor for me even 
though it's right in front of my feet? 's.

21. the crying over dumb stupid things that are so insignificant any other time in life.

22. strangers touching the belly, asking if you're about to pop.
i will punch you.

23. those first eight-ish months flew by, but not that it's mere weeks away, it's soooo slow.

24. waiting ever so patiently for the end of the day to take off your bra and million
layers of clothes.
{the bra, with the tank, with the shirt, with the over the belly pants.}

25. drying off completely after a shower is basically impossible. like shaving the legs.
and washing anything below the thighs.

did i miss anything?

xoxo

life lately 05.19.2015

lately.

baby is always in our bed. i don't mind so much. he very likely won't still be here 

when he's 12. so, cosleep it is.

mother's day belly shot. 05.10.2015

i'm super ready to have this girl. i hit 36 weeks in a couple of days.

but i've basically just been sleeping the last three weeks away

due to a slight miscommunication about my meds, 

which i'm sure is my fault due to pregnancy brain farts,

so i couldn't keep my eyes open. ever. 

all that should improve this next week.

also, my 33rd birthday is one month from today.

also, i did something crazy today.

also, i am expecting a product in the mail, which i'll soon share alllll about, that i'm

hoping will give me a boost of energy this last month.

*hyperventilating now. holy crap. one month to go. 

someone hold me. and come clean my house. 

and bring me a burrito. mkay thanks.*

oh, hey handsome blue eyed boy. i love that his eyes are still so brilliantly blue.

he's been our happiest little boy of the bunch. 

and crazy enough, that also means he is our most sensitive. he gets his feelings hurt the easiest.

also, kids that can buckle themselves?

yes, please, all the live long day. 

there are many things to love about kids getting older.

i really do not live in the i wish they were babies again.

i live in the this is the here, this is the now, embrace it.

and sometimes lock it in a room with a tv and a snack, yo.

sure, kid, take your almond milk to the couch after i just told you twelve times in a row to take

it to the table. but, whatevs.

my sweet kids remembered that they have been getting me these special strawberries 

for mother's day for the last four-ish years. 

and yup, totally ate them all in one sitting.

it's what you must do if you don't want one of your five children to get to them before you do.

amiright?

 there is really no telling what's on this kid's face. but he asked for a photo, so.

moody and serious? 

yes. jonyn, to a T.

friday's top ten 04.24.2015

1. if you have never cooked hard boiled eggs in the oven, DO IT. 

so easy. and even when you're using free range or farm fresh eggs, guys, 

so. easy. to. peel. so easy. like, crazy easy. 

i decided the kids needed more than peanut butter protein in their lunch 

boxes, so i wanted to batch make eggs for the week.

and since a) school lunches are so costly and b) one of my 

children is showing the signs around his midsection that the school lunches

are doing him no. good. at. all. i've been trying to be more diligent in 

sending them with lunches from home.

2. guys. creepy parking lot stalkers. gosh. i don't like parking closer to the

back of the lot simply because there are so many people asking for money

or donations of some kind there. and dude, it's not cool when i have small children

with me and am in the eighth month of pregnancy. i do have my tazer, but still. 

there has to be a better way to get your donations.

3. so yesterday was interesting. i'm sitting in my bed for reasons i forget now.

(other than it being comfy and i'm largely pregnant and my feet get propped up).

and brennen, he's four, walks in and tells me that greyson just went pee in the toilet.

what the what?! he's been watching all the other male species in the house go pee,

but has utterly refused to do it himself. til yesterday. then he just kept right on truckin'. 

using that toilet like it was his job. i was so proud. he was diaperless all day long.

basically training himself, i'd say. except for the pooping. he so won't sit on the toilet.

so midday when he started saying his belly hurt, i knew why, but couldn't get him on the toilet. 

he'll get there. i mean, jonyn potty trained himself in a week at this age, too. true story.

i'm a really big believer in not forcing your kids on the toilet simply because of an age that

people "think" they should start using it. that's silly to me. if the bladder is not physically developed 

enough to keep from squirting out pee every 2.5 minutes, then hey, save yourself some heart ache

and wait til their little developing bladders are ready to hold it and

 squeeze it out only when prompted. my two cents on parenting for the day.

take it or leave it.

4. and in other news, let's talk about my oldest child. y'all. his hair stanks. like, all the time, 

even right after a shower. i can smell the shampoo, but then i can all smell the muskiness. mustiness? 

my pregnant brain doesn't know right now. musky, i believe. help a girl out.

also, smelly armpits. so that's started. *sigh. 

it's a new adventure in the chambers' household.

5. so. i like to paint my nails. and i don't like when they chip. 

so when i saw a gel hack on pinterest several months ago, i knew i had to try it. 

(and i have been meaning to share it with you).

momma can't be going to the nail salon every two weeks. 

ain't nobody got time for that. or moneys. 

here's the original post: CLICK HERE.

my modification:

polish, gel, polish, top coat. 

but only THAT brand of top coat she mentioned.

it dries ridiculously fast.

(get the gel coat and top coat at Sally's).

and also, my personal favorite polish is the Sally Hansen complete salon manicure.

(you can get that from target).

my nails last a week without chipping or peeling. 

which honestly is about the time i'm ready for a new color.

because i really love and thrive on change.

it's why i am not a consistent person in life. 

it's why i continually change what i want to be when i grow up.

it's why i rearrange my furniture all the time. 

it's why i paint my walls more than what is probably necessary.

but i digress.

6. y'all. seven weeks and six days left until my estimated due date.

pray with me now that she comes on june 20th. that's my date. 

that's what i have my sights set on.

{photo from yesterday, at 32wks}

7. i have been trying to get outside more. in the afternoon, after the kids after school chores are done,

i have been letting them go out front and and ride their toys and kick and throw balls around.

and i've been sitting out there with them.

natural vitamin d is so life giving. i always forget how much so.

8. the latest episode of grey's anatomy. gaaahhhhhh. 

that's all i'll say about that.

9. so i have been drinking third trimester tea on the daily hoping my over worked

uterus will be nice and toned by the time it's go time.

i have my clary sage essential oils all ready to slather on my ankles to give labor a jump start.

and i'm doing a daily-ish squat to try and help my pelvis stay open and help her descend.

(although as of right now, she's butt down. and i have no doubts she'll flip when

she's good and ready.)

my 40 week mark is june 18th, my birthday is june 19th, and i so desperately

want her to have her own birth date, like all the other kids,

so on june 20th, it is go time for me, meaning, i will start seriously trying 

to naturally induce and get my girl here so i can see her sweet face. 

and yes, we are doing another home birth, if you were wondering.

10. i really, really love my husband. 

i am a lucky girl. super, super blessed. 

it has sometimes been a hard road to travel in our marriage.

but nowadays we rarely argue or fight. and when we do, it's not a blow up,

and it's over faster than i can even believe. he lets me lounge around right now

without a single complaint. he's not worried about our sticky floors, even though i am.

he does the dishes. he sweeps. and he still goes to work on the daily to bring home the bacon that

 allows us the ability to keep me here at home with the little ones.

i have much respect for his attitude about life. our life. the lives of others. his life.

i just want to brag on him. i don't do it enough. i don't tell him enough.

 i don't thank him enough. and i may not even hug him enough. 

but i'm beyond grateful for his heart. his heart for life, for me, for our kids.

he's the perfect spouse for me. he was made to be with me all of our days. 

i'm so appreciative of him.

love you, honey.

xoxo

baby 6 update: 31w 5d.

it feels like it's been a while since i've given a real update. 

so i wanted to do that for my frands that are far away and my family that is also far away.

today, i'm 31 weeks and 5 days. and i took these real camera photos yesterday.

and i'm only fancy because i had to leave the house and felt like being fancy.

it's a rare thing these days.

i see my midwife tomorry to get my belly measured and mashed around on.

i'm hoping she can tell me if baby girl is head up or head down. 

all the movement in my belly is at the bottom the past couple of weeks, 

so i'm anxious to know which way she is laying.

plus, she has been a pretty sleepy girl, busy growing and all.

but i will say that my braxton hicks contractions have also slowed with her current dormant state.

(she does move, i promise. she's just not the feisty little dancer she was up until now).

 some deets about how i am doing and feeling and all that.

first, i'm tired. like, really tired. and feeling so completely overwhelmed by

all the things that need to be done daily or weekly that i just can't seem to 

keep up with. so overwhelmed, in fact, that i had a meltdown on sunday over it.

my floors are gross, the dishes piled, and my laundry never stops.

and really, there's more. but i just feel behind. and i actually prefer

to have a tidy house, i just can't do it right now and it makes me feel so, so overwhelmed 

to the point of tears.

 bean and cheese burritos with extra salsa from rosa's are the real way to my heart right now.

and precut tropical fruit. and HEB's organic italian soda, peach bellini flavored. 

those are all i want to eat and drink. 

i wish i was kidding.

it's so nuts how tastes buds can change during this time. and how certain food textures

can mess with a motha's mouth.

most other foods just sound gross.

 i have blown up this go around. like, all that weight loss i pushed so hard for, 

it matters not. i'll be starting completely over.

and what is so crazy to me, is that my husband still finds me attractive.

with the giant belly. and the double chin. and the dimply legs for days.

i don't get it. but i am so grateful that God gave him a heart for me

that never changes. i think he unknowingly adapts to my looks,

and girls, i am so thankful. he loved me at my biggest, my smallest,

and my most pregnant. and found me attractive in all of those.

 the prenatal depression is still being kept in check. though, sometimes it does

threaten to overtake me. i still can't climb out of bed at a descent hour because

i truly sleep my best sleep in the later morning hours. and i always have.

plus mornings, gaahhhh. down with early mornings.

now i can only think about burritos and i forgot what i was going to say.

someone bring me half a dozen burritos, stat!

i kid. 

sorta.

xoxo

random baby thoughts.

my little peanut just can't decide if she likes to be head down or right side up.

so, she flips. and flops. in the most uncomfortable of ways. 

and last night, laying in bed, i could feel her turning from side to side.

i could feel her limbs with my hands as she tossed from side to side.

hmph, just like her momma, i suppose.

{29wks 3days}

lately, when she does actually flop to the head down birthing position,

her kicks feel like they are going to come straight out of my stomach.

she's a strong one.

i mean, she's going to have to be with a greyson-child as a big brother. oi. 

 i saw from her 3d sono what she might look like. 

of course, they still never come out looking quite like you think they will.

i only know she'll get the big pouty lips, which i am excited about for her.

but who will she look like, really? and will she get my temper? or my creativity?

will she be easy going like daddy, with his ability to retain all the knowledge? 

will she be nurturing like kanyon?

will she be a spit fire like greyson? or a geeky nerdy-nerd like taylan?

or as energetic and bouncy as b? maybe serious as heck like jo?

although, she's a busy little girl in utero, so probably not that last one. 

it will be an exciting ride. after you have so many children from the same parents,

you can totally start to see the same traits shared by a few of them.

so i will be watching and waiting to see what bits and pieces she 

has in her personality from the other seven of us.

i had one brother growing up. so it is hard for me to imagine coming into a family

as the eighth member. but i know she will fit right in from the get-go. and i know

it'll be as natural as newborn sleep for her to be in our family.

she's already ours. she already belongs. my prayer is that she, and all my children,

always feel like they belong.

and i know i can do a better job at making my older kids feel that way as they transition

out of boyhood into the mystical, hormonal, scary world of changing voices,

and changing bodies, and raging hormones.

bless them.

and Lord, help us as parents.

and i never would have thought my kids would span twelve years and we would be

going through such different phases from pre-pubescent to newborn, at the same time.

yet, here we are, traversing both realms together.

it's a far cry from the days when i had two toddlers running around by themselves.

but this is our life, our current, our now. 

so we can embrace it or fight it.

and just like i always, always embrace my age,

i want to figure out how to embrace these wildly different stages in life with my boys

and my one sweet girl.

xoxo

can i just be honest?

because i feel like i should. 

when i first found out i was pregnant with a sixth child,

and even with my premonition of having a sixth child that would be a girl named ruby,

and after the shock wore off (that took quite a while),

i was super angry.

i was mad that God would make me go through the pains of pregnancy again.

i was mad that He was putting me through another round of no sleeps

and dependent babies.

i was just so mad that i had to go through it all again,

when i was on the brink of having more independence as a human person.

when i had finally gotten my body back and i was shaping it up.

when i was tired of being tired and waking up a trillion times at night.

when i had just had a baby/toddler that was thee hardest of the bunch.

i was mad. 

i actually resented the pregnancy. not the wee little one,

just the fact that i was pregnant all over again.

and the last pregnancy just about did me in.

i fist-to-the-sky'd God. 

and then i started going through (or at least realized what it was)

prenatal depression. depression is just such an ugly beast.

lemme just tell y'all, i was such a rough couple of months.

and then we found out we were for sure having a little lady,

and it took a little more time, but i finally got over being so angry.

however, during that angry, i felt such a disconnect to my faith that

i let it fall by the wayside. and goodness, i can tell. 

and i can feel Him tugging on my heart strings to come back to Him.

my scared heart just doesn't even know where to begin. 

i just know i need to start somewhere, ya know?

and probably thanking Him for finally blessing us with one of the greatest desires of 

my heart is a great place to start.

because, after the first two babies, i knew i so badly wanted a little girl.

i love each of my boys and absolutely would not change a single thing 

about them or their birth order or how many of them we have.

they are ours. they are amazing. they are crazy and sometimes hormonal.

but they are our beautiful boys.

and to round it all off, we are getting our sweet girl, Miss Ruby-loo.

we are certainly blessed beyond what i could have ever imagined.

and now it's time to find my way back to full reliance on God and nothing more.

xoxo

when the "all yours?" is a happy question.

so often, the question, "are they all yours?" is asked in a way that 

is offensive. like, the asker is just stunned you would dare have more than

one to two children. or the asker is thinking there's just no way in bleep one person 

is capable of either a: having this many children or b: caring for that many children.

today i took the big kids to get their poor little eyes checked, and it's spring break,

and daddy has a job, so all of my kids went with us. i walked in and this little adorable asian couple

was there with their teenage daughter. they both had big grins on their faces as we walked in

saying, "so cute," in their sweet little accents. the husband almost immediately asked if 

they were all mine, still grinning as big as ever.

yes, they're all mine. and i didn't roll my eyes when asked this time.

because for once, it was asked in such a way that made me feel like they were geniunely

excited that i had a brood of five little lads to care for.

they kept watching us and muttering so cute between moments of speaking a language 

i didn't understand. it was so sweet.

the husband asked  if we had a set of twins in the bunch

(also a question we get asked often).

no, no twins!

and goodness, when the sweet little wife asked what was inside, 

as she pointed to her own belly,

and i said a girl,

you seriously would have thought they were family,

just as excited as everyone else to find out we're finally getting our girl.

their voices got a notch louder with awes and congratulations.

i just smiled so big and my heart felt like it might burst from the sincere joy these

complete strangers expressed for us.

it was so refreshing to be asked about our crew, our rather large crew,

without the usual....

i don't know how you do it.

boy, your hands must be full.

i bet you stay busy.

and blaaah blah blaaah blah blaaah.

the usual things that are said in a less joyful way.

 it's like those sweet moments in the grocery store when you have all the kids

with you and the elderly couple you keep passing just smiles and stares

with such sweetness behind their eyes every time your carts pass.

you know the ones, right?

i'm thankful for this couple today, and for all the sweet older couples

that smile instead of glare.

--------------------------------

our girl:

25wks 4days

our ultrasound last week. just look at her lips.

she's going to have big pouty lips like two of our other children.

24wks6days

measuring 1lb 13oz, right on track.

xoxo

baby 6. 24wks.

why hello.

i just thought i'd stop and bring you a baby bump and a prenatal depression update.

first, here's a 24 week bump, taken on my phone so i could show my momma.

and let me just tell ya, maternity clothes are way less tent like than they were 10+ years

ago when i was large and pregnant with my first little lad.

prenatal depression. so many peeps have no idea what it is or have even heard of it. 

 so much more awareness needs to be made. this is why i first spoke of it.

and so what have i done to help keep it calm and under control?

first, i started taking supplements and lots of them.

getting in vitamin d, b-complex, and my midwife suggested a combination

of vitamin e and evening primrose, so those are in my vitamin box, too.

i also take omega-3, my prenatal, and some others.

and honestly? those seem to really be helping.

before my hibernation (as my sweet husband politely called it),

i was only taking what my internal med doctor prescribed: thyroid meds and vitamin d.

i do feel much better.

i try to get a lot of water in, too, and i don't know if that really helps, but it sure makes 

me feel better.

we also went ahead and replaced our dilapidated 10+ year old mattress that was so slanted

on my side that i'm surprised i didn't roll right off with my current state of roundness.

we purchased a bigger bed (king) that is memory foam from a local little bed store

and it is dadgum comfortable. the extra space gives greyson room to waller around

in the bed and allows me to sleep better. (yes, he is still in our bed at night).

like seriously, i was waking up multiple times every night (and not for a midnight potty run,

either), and i never thought it was solely because of our mattress, but it was. it so, so was.

because, i only wake up now when a rogue toddler foot pushes into my back

(or the occasional potty break). so i'm sleeping so much better

and i think that has helped me, too.

now don't get me wrong... my baby-growing body still needs extra sleep, 

and i will unashamedly sleep until greyson rolls out of bed each morning.

and that's usually around 9:30 or so. i have always been one of those peeps

who has needed 8-9 hours of solid sleep. ain't no gettin' by on just 6 or so.

so now that i'm carrying yet another child and i'm pushing 34, my poor

broke down body just needs the extra Z's. and so be it.

gimme all the extra sleep.

 24 week + 4 day bump.

and there you have it. for me, supplements and rest have helped me with prenatal depression.

for someone else, it might look like a drastic diet change or chatting with a specialist or

getting on prescribed meds. and that is all okay. all of that. if you are not feeling

your pregnancy and feel kind of sad or just down for unexplained reasons,

seriously talk to your doctor or midwife. and if they look at you like  you have

three eyes, dadgum find someone else. it is not worth going through months 

of feeling blue before your baby is even here, trust me. i did it with my last baby.

it was one of the two worst times in my life. don't suffer alone my pregnant mommy friends.

xoxo